I got a facebook message from Bruce today. Yes, that Bruce,
the oh so tall, handsome, red-headed man of my high school dreams. He was
always yummy to look at, but that was not what I admired most. It was his
unabashed Bruce-ness. At a time when everyone was struggling to fit in, Bruce
was doing his best to stand out. And he did, not by being a braggart or a show
off, or a clown, but by being himself.
He tried on different personas and ideas, and admittedly there was some
definite weirdness, but he wasn’t in your face about it, he just was. And I so
admired him for refusing to be anything but himself. I thought he must be
marvelously brave.
And from the tone of his message, he is still being delightfully
himself. I had to laugh, and marvel for a moment at his delicious Bruce-ness.
But then I got to thinking about my closest high school
friends, and how we were all ‘different’ –none of us were fitting in, and
because we knew we didn’t fit, we quit trying and instead went about the
business of trying to figure out who we were. There was some weirdness, and a
whole lot of fun.
When I think about my life, and the things I’ve done, I
realize that I’ve done a lot. I’ve been an original; so far I’ve done a pretty
decent job of being Tracy. The things I am most proud of, that I am most
pleased that I have experienced or accomplished, were things that felt right
for me- and every time I was able to hear my inner voice, it didn’t matter what
anyone else thought or said or did, I knew what I was doing. I knew it was
right and good and exactly where I needed to be.
I’m noticing the amazing power in simply being myself, in
following my instincts, in being vulnerable enough to be me, no matter what
anyone else might think. And often when I’ve deliberately dared to something a
little wild, maybe even a little crazy, I haven’t been put down or judged, I’ve
been applauded. Strangely enough, it’s not that I haven’t been being Tracy, it’s just that I haven’t
been seeing me be Tracy.
Thank goodness for the new graduated lenses!
“Today you are You, that is truer than true.
There is no one alive who is Youer than You.”- Dr Seuss
“Our
deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are
powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens
us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and
fabulous? Actually, who are you not
to be?” –Marianne Williamson
