What I really, really, want...

I’ll tell you what I want, what I really really want.

Well, I would if I knew what I wanted. Sometimes I think know, but I’m realizing that sometimes I have a hard time admitting it. And I’m not sure why. But admitting you have a problem is the first step, right?

I can generalize, and tell you what I want. Connection. Love. Acceptance. Fun. Joy. Laughter. Freedom. I can slightly more specific: I want dark chocolate.  A good red wine. A long slow kiss that leaves me breathless. But other times, the details are a little fuzzy. Mostly things become clear after the fact- I liked that. I didn’t want that. This is not what I expected. Wow, more of this, please. (That’s my favourite, I won’t lie)

I want to know more, more of the time. I want to want, and I want to shout my desire from the roof top. I AM APPROPRIATE! I WANT WHAT I WANT AND THAT’S FUCKING AWESOME!

Yea, that’s what I want. The platter doesn’t have to be silver