From July 13th Jazz Night

Last night the Universal Hall was turned into a jazz club-no smoking, but tables and chairs, candles and wine and some gorgeous live jazz music. Everybody danced, with everybody. It was so great to see people enjoying being in their bodies, enjoying the music, enjoying being, period.

Some were in jeans, some in shorts and tees, some in their dress-up dance clothes- long skirts, flowing layers. There were men in dress pants and a crisp shirt and men in overalls, many South-American inspired outfits and even a few cocktails dresses that would have been welcome in any nightclub in the world.

A delicious mélange of people from all over the world, all focused simply on enjoying themselves. No one was worrying about being judged for their clothes or the company they were keeping or what they drank- it was simply about being alive, really alive, in the moment.

I’ve noticed in the past that that many people from Findhorn, and other spiritual, ‘green’, earth-conscious groups, including many sacred- circle dancers dress a certain way. Their clothes are made of natural materials, they dress simply, and don’t wear make-up or colour their hair. Their choices about their physical appearance are obviously echoing their eco-friendly lifestyle.

That’s not me. I colour my hair. I love my blue jeans. I like me a long dance skirt but I don’t as a rule do long lacey flowey things. And I love my lipstick. And I shave my legs.

And it took me a while to get over judging myself about it. I felt bad for wanting my eyeliner and my blonde streaks, not to mention my smooth underarms. I wondered if people thought I was wrong for dressing the way I did. I guess there is always a part of us that wants to fit in, wants to be liked. I never had one instance of anyone even looking at me funny, anyway. I expect most people are more inclined to e like me, too busy judging myself to worry about judging others.

But here I am, evolved, enlightened, and closer than I have ever been to allowing me to be simply me, and do dress and act the way that pleases me. 

But was I on that dance floor in a knee-length, form-fitting, cleavage-baring cocktail dress all beautifully made-up? Nope. 

I am traveling in Europe for the summer with a backpack. I have 3 t-shirts and 2 tank tops, a skirt, a pair of jeans, a pair of stretchpants, two pair of serviceable shoes, and one dress. Voila! I am hyper aware that I have to be able to carry everything I have on my back, and that the European airlines have strict weight restrictions. I have no blow dryer and while I did bring a mini curling iron, I’ve barely had time to use it.

And it’s great. It’s freeing and fabulous to have given myself permission to go the store in stretchpants without doing my hair first. But wearing lipstick, of course. Maybe I will wear my dress to tomorrow.

PS. I spent two days in Paris and I have SEVERE shoe envy. Everybody has beautiful shoes for doing their daily everything. Ooh la la!